Confession Numero Uno: In September AND October, Heather emailed me about Mid-Month Confessions, and I completely flaked on the post altogether. Then, because she’s a good friend and didn’t completely give up on me, she emailed me about November’s post too. I told her I was in, I’d even been keeping a running list of confessions to share, but I asked if we could move it to Wednesday (instead of Tuesday – the technical “mid” month) so I could do a “Teaching Tuesday” post yesterday… And then… I didn’t even get that teaching post up at all. Ugh. Totally my life these days! 😉
ANYWAY…
I’m back today! Happy mid-month friends. Can you believe it’s the middle of November already?!? Thanksgiving is in ONE WEEK!!! Check out Heather’s confessions (quirks and phobias edition) and read on for all the ways I’ve been acting a fool lately…
But first, speaking of acting a fool, this Halloween outtake seemed appropriate for a post like this. Please enjoy.
November 2016 Confessions:
– If you follow me on Instagram, you already know this story, but about a month ago I accidentally dialed 9-1-1 from my Apple Watch. It was, seriously, the WEIRDEST thing. I was literally standing in front of my class of juniors in the middle of teaching when my watch made a weird noise. I turned off what I assumed was an alarm and then looked down just in time to see that it was calling 9-1-1. I hung up immediately, but it wasn’t fast enough. Within seconds, they were calling me back on my cell phone – across the classroom – and I had to explain to the dispatcher (in front of all my students mind you) that my watch had mysteriously made the call and there was no emergency. THEN, because I work at a school and I couldn’t be certain that the dispatcher actually believed me (can you imagine the drama if rescue vehicles had started showing up?!?!), I had to make the “call of shame” up to the front office and inform them of my mishap too. Not my finest teaching moment, but it did make Twitter… So there’s that. #ipromiseiteachcapitalization
– You already know I’m, like, the best preschool mom ever ;), but I’ve really been stepping up my game lately. (For the record, SAM himself signed me up to bring napkins for his Thanksgiving Feast this year, I didn’t even tell him to. That’s my boy!) Anyway, recently I got a call at work from Sam’s teacher reminding me that his school picture proofs (and order form) were past due. Being late was bad enough, but, y’all, I threw those suckers right in the trash when I saw them a few weeks before. (Insert embarrassed monkey emoji. Seriously though, who knew you had to return PROOFS?!?) I’m not heartless, but here’s the thing: his outfit looked like a school uniform (boring khaki shorts and a navy polo), he was wearing shoes I HATE, and they had him holding a little mini pumpkin awkwardly in his lap. He looked darling, to be sure, but I have no room for extra paper in my house… I told the teacher, of course, that I had “misplaced” the proofs and offered to pay for them instead (thankfully, she didn’t take me up on that offer – Jeff would have flipped!). Oops.
– Also ranking high on my list of embarrassing moments, I got pulled over this month for having expired tags (no big deal). The terrible part is that I was on a pretty busy road when I saw the lights behind me, I completely panicked, and I pulled in to the first parking lot I noticed… Which happened to also be the most popular family restaurant on that side of town (the side of town I teach in, mind you). It was 6PM (of course) on a Tuesday – kids eat free night – (of course), so there was no where to discreetly park (of course). SO, I did what any normal 32-year old driver would do… I stopped my car right smack in the FRONT of the restaurant and stuck my head out the window to ask the officer if it was OK. He loved it. All the people reversing around me and staring at my (very identifiable) minivan, did not love it. I didn’t want anyone getting the wrong idea about me, so I spent the next twenty minutes (why does it take SO long to run a license and write a ticket?) smiling and waving at passerbyers. Like one does.
– Sam’s been on a Game of Life (you know, the board game from our childhood where you can have six kids, live at the beach, and be a professional athlete) kick lately, and one night as I cleaned up AFTER dinner, I discovered several game piece tiles in our soup. I don’t *think* anyone ate any, but I really can’t be sure. Note to self: check pots for strange objects before cooking in them.
*That reminds me: Did I ever tell you the story about my friend that accidently ATE the BUTTONS off my other friend’s (very expensive) wedding dress because she mistakenly took them for part of the bar snacks at the after-party?!? Its a good one. 😉
There’s more where those came from… But I’ll stop for now. Won’t you humor me by sharing one or two confessions of your own in the comments?!?!
Don’t forget to check out Heather’s post too!
May your hump day be swift and smooth,
E